I have asked myself this question severally; when do I draw the line? Events in
life especially with the people in our lives and those that just exist around us,
often puts us in that situation where we have to answer this question.
Sometimes, we unconsciously answer it. Life is such that we keep drawing lines
or letting things be. I thought I should share my thoughts with you on this
topic.
Before
I go on, I must apologise for being absent here for a while now… inshalla, I
will do my best to blog more often as my blog mother and blog grandmothers have
instructed. (Heheheeee!)
Being
new at my place of work, I am reserved, as I observe the new people (my
colleagues, even clients too) who are unavoidably now in my world. Humble
greeting and nice pleasantries are what I share with them, until I get to know
them better and being to gist with some more and even have some as my buddies. I
seem to flow very well with this particular girl… yea, she is intelligent and fine
and my connecting with her has just been natural (or so I see it). I see her as
a very good friend and she lives it too, but very recently my head keeps
telling me: “guy, you need to draw the line.”
Through
my university days, I had many friends, boys and girls. I lived a very open
life and stayed as free as possible with anyone that makes effort to get to
know me. I must confess, that life style is not an easy one. Knowing that you can’t
please everyone and that you have your own limitations, I fell out with some of
these friends. This very course mate of mine came close to me and we could
relate at a level, pretty simply because our heads could spinout beautiful and creative
ideas for work at a very fast rate, but beyond this, we never resonated. Our friendship
turned soar and somehow I wished I had drawn a line early enough to make him realize
the limitations in our association.
I had
this girl friend back then in school who would have been my girlfriend but for
the fact that I drew the lines. When I discovered her, she was in a
relationship which she admitted. That did not stop me from tripping for her. The
excitement for me began to increase when I realized that she was showing
feelings for me too. I practically fell for her, but at a point, jolted myself and
asked what I was doing. She was in her final year, and I still had two years to
go. I would have really loved to have asked her out, but at the time, didn’t have what
it takes to make the relationship last (if only my papa was Dangote or even
Fashola). I had to let go, as I creeped out of her life somehow. She is married now
with a beautiful daughter.
I really
don’t know how these stories would help buttress my point shaa…, but if you follow it through well, you will realize how drawing the line became a thing of importance at those instances.
It helps us define our lives and our associations. It reminds us of the
importance of knowing ourselves, for it is only when we do that we can really
know when to draw the line; when to say NO and mean it, and when to say
YES and follow through.
Drawing
the line helps our relationship with people, cause if it is effectively done,
your actions will not always be misinterpreted instead people around you will
see the good in it and will be positive minded in relating with you. Then, you
can have a life for yourself and give attention to other people and things that
deserve it.
Finally,
I must say that drawing the line must be a conscious action and it should be
well communicated to whom it may concern. Do not assume the person (or people) would
understand. Be firm at it and try not to compromise on it. If you must
compromise on it, then it also should be well communicated too, noting all the
condition for compromise.
I think
I need to stop here now; talking about something I know little about. You may know
more, why not share with me. I will be glad to read your comments on drawing the
line or a story from you about that time you drew the line or did not and what
became of it.
Cheers!
Sounds like someone is in lurve... Sometimes drawing the line might be futile, the heart want what the heart wants.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading this post.
"The heart want what the heart wants"...this heart seef! Lol.
ReplyDeleteLol awww so sweet. Yeah drawing in the line is very necessary in every kind of relationship
ReplyDeleteVery necessary indeed, even in blogvile abi?...lol.
DeleteTom-Tomi, thanks for stopping by.
This is so sweet to read, its important we know when to pause and when to continue.. Nice post..
ReplyDeleteThanks Gabby.
Delete**waves** Hello Papi...so I followed a link from Adaezenwa's blog (the best fiction writer I know) and I think I like it here....I agree with the most part of the post that drawing a line is very crucial...I am very particular bout boundaries...I don't need you assuming things are a certain way with me...I would rather clear your doubts...lovely blog Papi
ReplyDeleteTibs Tells Tales
Amazing... my blog grandmother came around **Grin** Thanks for the endorsement. As for Mami (Adaezenwa), she is just as awesome as she is... she tells me many of her inspiration comes from you. You to G-Mami are just too much - I have seen your blog.
DeleteNow let me draw the line on something, I am still a small boy o, I am nothing close to a Papi ooo...lol.
**bangs door** Papi!!!! You are due for a new post lah!!!!!!
ReplyDelete...Ok, G-Mami.
DeleteComing soon.
No mata how much u luv ur job,if u dont get along wit ur coworkers,u're bound to be dissatisfied. It's natural to wnt to becum frndz wit ur colleagues. Settin boundaries is one of d most important part of relationships. "Good fences make good neighbors".Nice post
ReplyDeleteI sure know who this Anonymous is. Thanks for your comment... Indeed, "good fences make good neighbors".
DeleteCheers!